Not a Rant, Not a Rave, Not Even a Cancer Lesson — This Is a Cancer Question.
Today I had my yearly checkup with my OB/GYN, which means it was about this time in 2011 that my whole cancer trip began. I thought it might even be the same date, so I asked Dr. K to check my records. He told me it was a year ago yesterday.
So, here’s the question. If it supposedly takes a year to get your life back after cancer, when does that year begin?
Was yesterday my “anniversary?”
Or March 18, when I was diagnosed?
Maybe April 27, the day of my surgery?
Or the end of August, after chemo ended?
It’s probably the last, I think. Truthfully, though, I know that innocent belief in my own infallibility will never return.
Cancer is now a part of my history. That makes it a part of my future, whether or not it ever recurs. It will always exist as another possible side trip. And I am responsible for catching it if it does.
Still, life shouldn’t be defined by a disease. Though this experience will always be a part of my past, it is not the whole of me. And while it’s true I look forward to having a choice in the length of my hair, and to not being so tired after a long day, I am also grateful just to be here.
Living after cancer — it’s a whole new journey.
This photo is from Tower Hamlets Cemetary Park in one of the worst neighborhoods in London.
“Though we travel the world over to find the beautiful, we must carry it with us or we find it not.”
— Ralph Waldo Emerson